9 Life Lessons From Surfing 2 Weeks in Hainan Province, China
How to Stay Strong and Become a Better Version of Yourself
I went to Hainan Province (“Sun-Moon-Bay”, Wanning) for 2 weeks of vacation. I learned a lot throughout the journey. And I think I came back to “the city” stronger and wiser. I consolidated 9 lessons that we could all apply in our lives. Enjoy!
Part A: Life Lessons from Surfing for 10 Days
1. You must experience discomfort and pain to get into the rewarding zone
On the first day of my surfing lesson, I went to the sea with my coach at 6 a.m. As there was a storm nearby Hainan Province, the waves were high and the sky was dark. My coach told me that my paddling skill sucks. So instead of paddling on the board, he asked me to swim to the “surfing zone” with a surfboard attached to my ankle. The whole experience goes like this: while you are swimming in freestyle, whenever you see a big wave, you need to dive underneath it, your body will experience the crushing current, and you’ll feel a pull on your ankle as your board is being carried away by the waves. When you reach back to the water surface to catch a breathe, you’ll see another wave coming. But there’s no time to rest or back out, otherwise, the wave would push you backward fiercely. You need to take all the courage you have and swim towards the wave. When you pass through around 5 big waves, you will reach the “surfing zone”, where the waves are much smaller, and you can sit on your board to take a rest, and pick a nice wave to ride (the reward). Sadly, I stayed in the “surfing zone” for less than a minute, and a wave brought me back to the shore again. But I think the lesson learned in surfing can also be applied in life: To get any reward in life, we must hustle through all the initial pain and discomfort. It’s part of the process, and there’s no shortcut.
2. Make it hard in the beginning, then the rest would be easy
The waves on the second day were much calmer, and I got to managed to ride around 3–4 waves. The fear was gone immediately. I also felt like my muscles were stronger. The lesson learned here is: we need to be more demanding towards ourselves at the beginning of our journey. The strength, patience, and skills developed will help us thrive later on.
3. Devoting sufficient time for deliberate practice is essential to become great at any skills
When I first arrived in Hainan, I went to surfing shops and asked how many lessons do I need to master surfing. I wanted to learn everything in 10 days. None of the shops could promise that. I thought they were just being greedy. After surfing for 3 days, I realized surfing is hard. Every aspect of the sport requires sufficient time to practice and internalize, from paddling, popping up on the board, to riding the waves, etc. I tried to learn more effectively by breaking the sport into bite-size components and practice each of them deliberately. I also took notes on what I learned every night. It felt good acquiring the beginner’s mindset and realized being a good coach meant that you have to help your students take baby steps, repeat important messages multiple times, and be observant in spotting areas for improvements.
4. Praise yourself for making attempts, even if you “fail”
You will experience many failures in surfing- e.g. you paddle on the wrong wave, and you fall right after you catch the wave. I realized if you beat yourself up every time you fail, you’ll soon lose all the confidence to keep trying, you would just sit on the board and wait for the “perfect wave”. So instead, every time I paddle or make an attempt to stand on my board, I’ll praise myself, “I appreciate that you are attempting. It’s awesome!” Afterwards, I realized I’d be more willing to go catch more waves, no matter if I succeed or not. Sometimes, we need to be the ones who pat ourselves on the back throughout the journey.
Part B: Other General Life Lessons
1. Protect yourself because no one else will
When you pay extra money for your hostel or driver, no one will be honest with you, and they’ll just collect the money anyway. It also applies to relationships. If you put your heart out too early, sometimes you’ll just get hurt easily. We all need to learn to protect ourselves as we grow older, but at the same time, still having faith that there are honest, authentic, and kind people out there, that we can trust and rely on.
2. Have something to look forward to every day, it will bring healthy habits into your life
I looked forward to surfing every morning in Hainan. Since surfing requires so much physical energy, it gives me so much motivation to sleep before 12, wake up at 6, and quit unhealthy habits (like eating trash food or watching porn). Having a goal that requires us to be our best selves helps us put great habits in place. This inspired me to think about what type of goals I should have in my daily life that can motivate me to get up and be my best self.
3. If you want to be better than others, work longer and harder
My surfing coach was actually in the National Canoe Slalom Team before he switched to the National Surfing Team. After the transition, he woke up every day at 5:30 am and kept surfing until he couldn’t see the waves because he wanted to compensate for the training difference compared to his peers. Now he’s number 3 in the entire national team. As I’m also changing to a new career, this work ethic and hustle mindset really inspire me to apply a new lifestyle into my life (I’ll talk more about the 5 a.m. club concepts later on).
4. Have Digital Detox
In the last few days of my trip to Hainan, I surf for around 3 hours in the afternoon. There are moments where I’ll just lie on my surfboard and appreciate how beautiful the sea, the clouds, the sunshine, and the birds that are flying in groups. There are no screens, no notifications, and no FOMO (Fear of Missing Out). I feel centered and calm. I think the lesson here is to think about how we can incorporate less screen time in our lives, and have more time being in the moment. You don’t need to go on a vacation. Simply turning off most notifications of our APPs, turning on airplane mode from time to time, and going out for a walk without your phone, can help you have a Digital Detox
5. The right mindset could help us relieve relationship pain
Relationships are hard. It gives us emotional pain more than anything else in life. Sometimes acquiring the right mindset could help us relieve part of the negative emotions we held in our hearts. My good friend Janet Chu recommended a writer, Bianca Sparacino, to me. Her writing is wise and comforting. Here are 2 quotes that I love:
- “Nothing that is meant for you will ever get away. Love deeply and without the need to possess or own; let beautiful connections pass through you without attachment, slam your heart into the people and the places and the things that ignite something deep inside of your soul, and I promise, I promise- the right thing will stay. You will never lose what is for you.”
- “At the end of the day, if someone wants to be in your life, they will be. Truly- they are capable, they will make the effort, they will show up. If they do not- let that be your closure. However, you do not have to hate them. You do not have to remember their contribution to your life as anything but beautiful. Do not ruin them in your mind, do not grip until you feel resentment. Instead, love them without attachment. Love the lessons they taught you. Wish them well every single time you think about them… If the people in your life left because they were not ready to value you, or love you, or be there for you, do not wish for them back, do not ask for them to be more than they can be at the moment. Wish for them to figure themselves out. Wish them to grow. They are on their own journey- a journey you are not a part of. And that is okay. You have to learn that that is okay.”
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